Recycle!

PROFANITY ALERT!  Another gem from the old blog:  (Man I miss having the main subject of all my inappropriate/funny stuff on the other side of the planet!)

A solid reason why we shouldn't be let out in public:

Me: Wow, look at the size of that big-ass stuffed bunny! I am SO buying it for Emma! (pause) *whispers and looks around furtively* Do you think it's ok to say "ass" in the Hallmark store?

Military Man, loudly and with a big grin on his face: Who gives a shit?

A post to take up space.

Just another night of the raging inability to sleep because my mind won't shut off.  Man I love night shift/anxiety/having a husband too far away to listen to me.  So internet, you get to play the part of my spouse and listen to details of my really boring day!  (Since my husband is in a WAR ZONE and can't be reached at this very moment - booyah, I mentioned it yet AGAIN.) 

1.  Driving through Queen Creek today (to look at a house that is wu-haaaaaay too far from civilization for me to honestly consider moving into, even if it does sport a three-car garage and a kitchen to die for on 2.5 acres, where I could finally GET my herd of fainting goats) I spotted a business sign that read "What is Service Auto Repair".  I'm thinking NO on hiring these people for an oil change.

2.  I'm not really a Lord of the Rings fan, since I have a hard time following the looooong storyline and even if I could I can't remember which movie comes first in the trilogy so I end up watching them out of order and serving myself up a big helping of confusion.  But I picked up Chad's copy of the entire thing (I ran out of smut) and whadya know, this stuff makes a good read!  Well, at least until I fall asleep five minutes into it because it's so BORING.  Maybe I should skip over the prologue, which reads like the geneology "Nevaeh begat Zinzan" portion of the Book of Mormon.  The part that I always skipped.  (Maybe I should consider jumping into that right now to make myself fall asleep.)

3.  Emma and I are on Level 6 of Super Mario Brothers for Wii.  And you thought I wasn't a nerd because I can't follow LOTD!  This is also proof that I am indeed capable of concentrating on one brain-melting subject for nine hours straight.

That's going to have to finish up my lame-o list for tonight; I just realized that it's the end of the world and there is RAIN falling outside and I've left Bailey the sulcata out.  Time to go save him from the apocolpyse!  Pictures of Joey and Phoebe (take two) tomorrow!

Hey.

Emma's birthday has come and gone, and we've found the gift that keep on giving for her "main" present. (We let her pick out one big thing and then she gets a few smaller things for her birthday every year, the smaller things being surprises.) Emma has requested a friend for Trixie the stripper cockatiel. And since she's an only child and I'm incapable of telling those big brown eyes anything close to the opposite of YES we are currently waiting for her baby hand-fed pied cockatiel "Phoebe" to finish learning to eat only seed and come home to us. I've purchased a bird from this particular store before, and unfortunately when I walked into the back room where are the babies are, where all the half-bald little heads poke up over the top of their tupperware containers and beg for food, I spotted the EXACT same breed and color of lovebird I had and adored when I was married to the first husband. The exact same kind of bird that used to chase my ex-husband's feet around the living room with his little beak wide open, threatening to bite his evil toes.

Sammy was a lovebird but still a little bit of a hater.

So when I picked up the tiny little blue and black look-alike and he peered up at me with his white-ringed eye and snuggled into my hand? It was over. I put a deposit on him, too. He should be home in about a week, too. His name is Joey. (Notice the "Friend's" references here?)

So Chad took THAT well.

And THEN last night we had all of Chad's side of the family over for dinner and cheesecake ( I can't seem to keep shoveling the leftovers of it into my mouth, but hey, that's better than the foot I'm usually shoving in there!) and Emma struck pay dirt in the way of presents. $70 in cash and gift cards! Today we drove to Wal-Mart, with the windows open to air out the car due to all the money BURNING A HOLE IN HER POCKET, and she picked out Super Mario Brothers for Wii.

And now I've got the beginnings of a blister on my left thumb from playing it for four hours tonight instead of going to the gym as planned.

A productive week!

An oldie but a goodie.

I'm pretty much just running on fumes right now, so here's a post from my OLD not-safe-for-work blog. (That you will never find, so seriously, don't even try. Muhahahaa!)

This is a small piece of a post from when I was back in nursing school:

Oh ok, here's something random and funny. The other night I'm crawling into bed next to Military Man and as he turns off the light I lean over to kiss him and get a taste of something really fruity on his lips. I tell him that he tastes funny, to which he replies, "Yeah, I found a jelly bean in the sheets!"

Back off girls. He's ALL MINE.

House update

Got the exterior painted and sanded, the wood floors varnished, and the walls put together!

Emma learned lots of new fun words that she's not allowed to use at school.

Nun paparazzi plus two

DSC03266, originally uploaded by Corn Child.

This is the shot right after I slugged him in the gut and then hugged him. Ok fine, I never slugged him in the gut. The impulse to do that disappeared the second I saw him walking down the little plane-hall (I have no clue what that thing is really called) and I burst into tears.

A HUGE thank you to US Air for being so cool and letting me past security so we could see our soldier get right off the plane and make a huge scene right in the terminal.

Horsey girl

DSC03387, originally uploaded by Corn Child.